I'm Not Ready :-(
Photo by Karoline Soares on Unsplash
Seeing Through the "I’m Not Ready" Script
This a soul-killing, inspiration sucking and self-sabotaging script. And I hear it from the mouths of way too many gifted women, who actually have a tonne to offer.
Women are stuck in this place, because it’s a safe place.
But it’s not safe at all, it’s a smoke screen if you think it is.
If you have prepared yourself, if you have invested in yourself and put in the time and the energy to dig into what your special way of helping others is, then this ‘I’m not ready,’ to say it without any sugar coating, is just an excuse.
We retreat into the belief that we’re not ready because the pain of staying stuck is more tolerable than the pain of growing and stretching out of our comfort zone.
No matter where you get to, there will always be something you don’t feel ready to do. And when you’ve trained yourself, gained valuable experience, practiced your craft on yourself and others, learned how to build and market your business so it could support you full time and you still feel not ready, what next?
I Never Felt Ready
Personally, my life is a long string of things I felt not ready to do.
I didn’t feel ready to be a VP in marketing.
I didn’t feel ready to travel across the world by myself 8 times.
I didn’t feel ready to spend three years struggling to survive a deadly cancer.
I didn’t feel ready to have a baby and raise a child in this messy world as a self-employed, single mom.
I didn’t feel ready to risk offering high-end services and having a much bigger impact in my work.
And now I have new projects I’m called to (more on these soon), that I feel not ready for. But yes you guessed it, I am not going to let that stop me now!
To help point you in the right direction, here are:
5 Big Little Secrets About the 'I'm Not Ready' Script
1. Most times you won’t feel ready until you actually do what you don’t feel ready to do.
We expect our feelings to precede our actions. But they never do! If we wait for the feeling to come around, then we will be waiting a long, long time. All the training, all the expertise, all the experience or even all the know-how when it comes to marketing and running the inner workings of a business do not create that 'ready' feeling you may lack.
By doing what you feel unready for, you will bust through the illusion of unreadiness. And you gain the visceral and hands-on proof of what you know in the form of results in your clients. Nothing can replace this constant growth that is the fastest learning curve I know of. It's fast because by doing it's not academic anymore, it has to work and therefore you will make it.
2. That feeling of being ‘not ready’ will come up into infinity only if you continue to run this unconscious program.
See if you can identify the signature feeling-blueprint of this lacking. If it feels complex and contains many feelings, you're likely tapping into an unconscious program. We mostly run programs or limiting beliefs because at some point before we could discriminate, we felt we needed them for protection. But even long after the situation is over that originally inspired the unconscious programming, you still run them because you can't see that they are running. And you will continue to do so until you consciously decide for yourself to choose freedom instead.
3. Devote your attention to who and how you can help.
When you’re hooked by your ‘I’m not ready’ feelings, it’s a flag that your attention is in the wrong place - on yourself. You ask yourself, "Do I measure up to others? Am I good enough to charge this much? Who am I to help anyone when I haven't figured everything out yet?" And chances are you don't like the answers you give yourself...but they are familiar. So familiar you may not even notice.
Obsessively having all of your attention on yourself is a source of misery. Our minds are negativity-hunting machines, so no doubt your self-searching is coming up with all of the seeming proof of why you're not ready. When you turn it around and give yourself permission to give most of your loving focus over to the people you can help, the flood gates of freedom swing open.
Allow yourself to swim in curiosity - about the inner experience of your ideal clients (if you know who they are), what they are celebrating, what they are struggling with, what they most desire and what they value. The deeper you can empathize with your ideal client, the more knowledge you will be able to intuitively download about how to help spare them unnecessary suffering getting to the solutions. Helping others is a true source of bliss.
4. We think we’re being humble to proclaim our unreadiness, but we’re really being ego maniacs.
Serving with your gifts is the most humbling thing ever. It's the opposite of being an ego maniac. Next time you hear someone proclaiming their 'not-readiness', watch how it makes you feel. Do you feel uplifted and think, 'wow they are so great!'? Or do you feel awkward, less hopeful and downright sorry for them? Not only does it hold them back to play small to their gifts, but it sets a low energy bar for everyone around them too. Coming into greatness in anything in your life is a source of delicious humility. Greatness makes us humble, receiving our gifts makes us humble and letting that be a source of enlightenment for others makes us humble too.
5. Your feelings are not the master creator of you, you are the master creator of them.
This last one is a kicker... we learned to bow down to our feelings like they are our master. But do we create our experiences, or are they creating us?
But it's not enough just to see the logic of it. We have such a long-standing habit of seeing feelings as happening to us from a mysterious source. When you turn this belief on its head, you assume radical responsibility for yourself and gain incredible freedom in the process. We only feel victim to our human experience, but this is absolutely not the case.
Ready to Get Past Feeling "I'm Not Ready"?
On the Equinox, March 20 I’m going to be showing you exactly how I get past this confusion in myself, and how to turn this around - especially when it comes to getting out and being seen for the magic you can create for the good of others.
So if you know deep down you are ready to get past this feeling of not being ready ;-) and really help people, but are still speaking in this ‘not ready’ voice, please join me for a free online class, “3 Simple Steps for Getting Past Your Fear of Being Visible in Your Business - So You Can Build a Nurturing Business Culture, Attract Great Clients and Be a Force for Creating the Change You Want to See in the World!"
In this free online class you will learn:
- How to create accountability for yourself and be precise about what inside of you holds you back from getting out in front of your audience.
- The bigger picture of why women hiding in the wings.
- A simple solution for a complex problem.
Here’s the link to register with your email to hold your spot:
Or leave a comment with any questions or comments on your experience below. xo
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